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ORPG, gedichten en schrijvers < Virtual Popstar
ORPG | Als adem lucht wordt
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When breath becomes air



Joshua (Josh) Milo Wyatt 
23


@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster





Dark times
lie
ahead of us and
there will be a
time when we
must choose
between what is
easy and what
is right.

Marlee Elicia Lavender // 21



Marlee looked angry at Ash as she gave him the key. 'You did this to yourself, you know. You're gonna need to solve this yourself.' He said scynical. 'F*ck you, Ash.' She gave him a punch while she walked past the guy, but he angrily turned around and grapped her arm. 'I'm not kidding Mar! That shit costs a lot of money, and we need that back from you!' The look in his face changed, it almost scared her. She knew he was serious. 'Let me go, you're hurting me!' She pushed away his arm and walked out of the house. 'We will be back Marlee, I know how to find you!' He yelled at her, but with no response. She was too afraid to go against Ash, she knew how he could be, although she never thought it would be against her. She didn't understand how it happened, how her friends turned against her, but someone must have betrayed her. She was too drunk to remember what exactly happened last night. She remembered going to the club with Esmé. The whole group was there, Chelsey, Mikael, and Ash... Ash who eventually gave her a stack of pills, and she didn't know why and already forgot about it the time they wanted to leave the club. She lost them. She didn't know when, or how, but she lost the pills and she realised that costs a lot of money. Of course Ash wanted that money back, but how was Marlee gonna get that? It wasn't fair, it wasn't her fault, why did he even hand over so much stuff to her?
When she heard her phone ring she almost forgot she had another life apart from the fake friends group. It was Isabel, who appperantly tried to call her all day. 'Hey, Isa, I am sorry I didn't answer. Something is going on end...-' Isabel didn't even let her finish. 'Marlee? I was worried! You haven't been at uni for a few days. Where have you been? Do you even remember we have a party tonight?' The party, alright... Of course Marlee had forgotten about the party. 'Marlee... Your silence says enough. Just make sure you can make it, we missed you...' Marlee could her the worry in her voice and that immediately made her feel bad for all her friends. She couldn't ditch them tonight, although she was in the worst mood to go to a party. 'Don't worry, I will make it. I will talk to you later, okay?'

@each 
Each
Internationale ster



Parties. Josh was quite good at them actually. He grew into them as he was getting older, with help from the manners learned from his parents, and of course: alcohol. Josh was there early to give Marlee some company, as she texted him stressed out about Marlee. 'She's probably fine, Isa, don't worry. Grab a beer and enjoy, darling.' she hated it, when Josh called her darling. 'Okay, honey. Could you maybe grab one for me?' she looked at him with this sweet little sad face. He hugged her, and felt the sexual tension rise every second. Okay, he felt sexual tension with almost everyone; he was probably still in his puberty. 'Please leave me alone, Josh, I'm not drunk enough for this right now'. He laughed and said 'I know you felt it too'. He left her alone to go outside, as it was quite cold outside and people were lazy, they used the balcony as a place to stack up the beer. Also a good time to smoke a cigarette and take a little moment for himself. New people came in, and as people know Josh as a very social person, sometimes he was quite the opposite. That's why he liked smoking; you could sneak away and just overthink life. He heard some people call his name, so he took his last zip of the cigarette before he threw it over the balcony. Most of his friends arrived and after grabbing some beers, he went inside to hug them. 'Here, Isa, your beer. Who wants some as well?' Josh just gave them around, smiled a bit and fulfilled his role as person to talk to. 

@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



It took her a while to pick some clothes and to fix her hair and make up, but Marlee still felt bad. She still felt ugly, and sad. She could try to look good, and try to feel good, but the problems wouldn't just go away. She grabbed her cigarettes from the table and put them in the pocket of her black velvet jacket. She wore a tiny black dress and her hair slightly curled over her shoulders. She put some dark red lipstick on her lips before she sneaked out of the house again, and made her way to the apartment of one of her friends. As she light on a cigarette she already thought of an excuse to tell her friends, knowing they would ask her where she had been. But Marlee was a bad liar. Everyone knew that. The best way to deal with it would be to just try to talk over it and switch subject. But when Marlee arrived at the place and the door opened, she was totally not prepared for the staring eyes and the awkward silence in the room. Her cheeks turned red and she searched for his eyes in the room, but she didn't see Josh that fast. He was probably the only one who could make her feel calm at such moments, but she had to deal with this on her own. 'Hey, guys,' She said awkwardly, and thank God Isa came her way. The talking went on, laughter filled the room and finally Marlee could breath easily again. 'Marlee, I've missed you!' She threw herself in her arms and Marlee couldn't help but let escape a smile. 'I am happy to see you, too! I'm sorry we didn't talk lately... I have been... Going through some things, but it is over now.' She tried to convince Isabel with a smile, but her eyes said more than she could. Isa knew better, but she also knew that Marlee wouldn't say anything unless she really wanted to, and decided to leave it with that. As Marlee wasn't really in the mood to talk to everyone, she went a quick round in the room to say hello to most of her friends when she finally found Josh. 'Hey, Josh. You look handsome tonight,' she gave him a wink and a silly smile came on her face. Just being back with her friends she realised how much she missed them, how much she needed them in these moments although she could never talk about what was going on right now.

@each 

Each
Internationale ster



His boring conversation got disturbed by one of his favorite voices. It made him turn around happily 'Hi, Isa.' He smiled as he   grabbed a lost piece of Isa's hair behind her ear, as he observed her without losing eye contact. She was still beautiful, and he couldn't help but smile while seeing her. Isa looked tired though, worried. 'You are beautiful yourself.' he said while throwing a cheeky wink. Josh really liked Marlee, she was a really good friend of his and he actually really cared about her. He knew she wasn't okay, but he didn't want to destroy the vibe. Sometimes, you don't want people to ask how you are all the time, he decided to wait for the right moment. Instead of asking the real questions, he grabbed her hand and took her, while gently pushing away all the party people, outside. He grabbed a cigarette and offered her one as well. 'People, so many people, you know I wasn't really feeling it but I'm happy you're here you know.' He smiled at her, and gave her a little hug. Josh knew people were looking; he knew what a lot of people were thinking as well. He kind of fucked it up with this girl, so he got some angry looks as well. Honestly, he didn't really care. Josh wasn't necessarily the nicest person alive. He chose the people he was nice to. He was standing close to Isa, and he couldn't help but notice, but they were good friends. He could get almost anyone he wanted, he shouldn't fuck up his friendship because of this attraction; maybe it was just there because they were good mates. Speaking of good mates 'How are you, Mar? You know I think you're beautiful, but you look tired, are you alright?' His hand was laying in her neck, and he was kind of 'massaging' her with his thumb. Well, massage was a big word, he was just moving his thumb up and down. It was about the gesture. 

@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



Just talking with Josh made Marlee already slightly feel better. It didn’t really matter what he said, Josh knew the right things to say to her and Marlee always appreciated that. She blushed slightly as Josh gently put a lost piece of hair behind her ear and his hands touched her face. Sometimes she longed for his touch, as it made her feel all the warm things inside. Therefore, gladly she took his hand and let him lead them the way outside, away from the party people and the noice. The could air made her tremble for a moment, but Josh’ body was close and that made the cold go away. She took his cigarette with a smile and pulled her lighter out of her pocket. She would need it, knowing what question was coming. She blew out some smoke and stared into the dark sky as she listened to Josh his voice. ‘I just didn’t sleep well,’ she said softly. The touch of his thumb in her neck made her want to come closer, but she didn’t dare to fall into his arms right now. Not only because she felt some people watching them, but also because she knew she would start to cry then. She was in big trouble. Bad sleeping wasn’t the only problem. She had done parties and clubbing all week long, she didn’t even want to start talking about the alcohol she had had these days, and especially the drugs... No one at this party knew her like that. No one would ever expect Marlee doing drugs, or any thing bad in particular. She always grew up as the shy girl with the strict parents. It kind off escalated when she and her friends started experimenting with alcohol and boys. From the beginning, everyone knew Marlee’s place wasn’t the best to be, as she was always in fights with her parents. They couldn’t handle her. The last few weeks had been even worse, especially since she met Ash and his friends. Deep down she knew from the beginning they weren’t good for her, but something in Ash wanted to make her stay with him. He was bad, he was interesting. Overall, her new friends were a new escape to get away from home. She didn’t meant to stay away from uni, and from her friends, she just kind off let it happen the last few days... Tears filled her eyes. Marlee looked away and smoked from her cigarette. She didn’t want Josh to see her this way. She didn’t want to explain what happened. ‘I am sorry Josh, I feel like I abandoned you. I needed to deal with some things...’ Almost afraid she looked into his eyes. She didn’t want to lie to him. Josh knew her situation at home, her relationship with her parents. Almost anyone in there closest friend group knew, but Josh and Isa were the only ones she felt she could really talk to. She had known Isa her whole life, and couldn’t imagine her life without her. And Josh, well, they have been friends for a long time, too. With Josh she always felt at ease. He was the only one who could cheer her up when she was down, who she could always talk to and he was always there for her. Sometimes she wondered if her feelings meant more, but only at times when she was really drunk. He was her friend, she didn’t want to mess that up.

@each 
Each
Internationale ster



She lied. Marlee was probably the worst liar he ever met. 'You're lying. I know you are. And Marlee, you will never abandon me. Sometimes we speak a bit less, it's fine, we'll always stay friends.' he said. He wanted her with her though, there wasn't a day he wasn't thinking about her. She was fragile, and he knew something bad could happen to her the day he wasn't paying attention to her. 'Marlee, you know you can always count on me. Whatever it is you're going through, I want to help you.' He zipped from his beer, and he was kind of annoyed some people disturbed them to do the same thing they were doing; smoke. What a way to disturb a conversation; someone yelled at him and said something female unfriendly. He sighed and just yelled 'Fuck off, Brian.' Anyway, they couldn't really continue the conservation and he knew she wasn't going to say anything anyway. All he had to do, was make sure she was allright every single day and just be there for her. Maybe they could have a good cuddle as old times. Someone pushed Marlee, making her stand against him. Josh just laughed, but he was way to conscious about her body against his. 'Sleep at mine tonight, okay?' he gave her a gentle kiss on her forehead and took a step back. He grabbed her hand, turned her around and danced a bit goofy. 'Let's have fun while we're here. We should get drunk like old times. Shots, you're good at making them; I say tequila.' 

@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



His words didn’t really make her feel better. What did she expect, anyway? Anyone knew Marlee was a bad liar, especially Josh knew her better than anyone else. For a moment she stared into his eyes. So badly she wanted to tell him what was really going on. But she couldn’t. What she had done, was something she needed to resolve herself. She didn’t want Josh to literally pay for her mistakes. She didn’t want to bring him into trouble either. What if Ash did something to him? She would never forgive herself if something like that happened. And besides, Marlee didn’t even have the moment to talk even if she wanted to, as people joined the balcony for a smoke. Not long after, Brian said something mean and someone else accidentally pushed her in her back, which made her stand even closer to Josh. She didn’t mind, though. She wanted his touch, she needed it. His question couldn’t make her more happy either. ‘Thank you, Josh. I really appreciate that.’ She couldn’t help but smile as she felt him giving her a gentle kiss on her forehead. This guy was everything, and she could only think of how lucky the girl should be if he had a girlfriend. Josh loved his single life, as did almost every student, but one day he would make the perfect boyfriend she thought.She giggled softly as he grabbed her hand  and danced a bit. Although she didn’t feel like getting drunk right now, she couldn’t say no to him. ‘Okay, let’s do shots then. But I would need a beer too.’ She laughed, somehow glad that conversation was over, and treated herself a first drink. She turned around smiling and grabbed his hand to walk inside, remembering the old times Josh had mentioned. She liked those times. Perhaps tonight could be an evening like that, and she decided to try her best to forget everything else and to enjoy this evening.There was enough alcohol packed on the kitchen table, but she searched for the bottle tequila. When she found it she happily poured two shots and gave one to Josh. ‘Cheers, on the old times then!’

@each 

Each
Internationale ster



He wanted to sleep with her. Not metaphorically, but literally. Or maybe both. He needed her more than anything. He laughed, emptied his beer and gratefully accepted the shot. 'Cheers.' he said and he drank the shot happily, semi happily. 'Wow, I forgot how disgusting this was.' Josh laughed and gave her a hug. He already had quite a lot of beers, which he was starting to feel; he always got really touchy when he was drunk. With literally everyone though, so the possibility of him embarrassing himself with Marlee wasn't too high. They mingled with the other group and before he knew it, it was 4 shots and 6 beers later and he was a bit drunk. This girl came up to him, they flirted; same old same old. She was pretty, long brown hair and blue eyes. It was exactly his type, and he was definitely interested. Josh was not even trying, and she was already leaning in, but just before they kissed, he saw Marlee and he couldn't help but think about her. They were friends though. Josh didn't even know if they had already kissed or not, and if they had, if it was a good kiss. He left the pretty girl where she was, and left with a simple 'Sorry'. It was time to go home, and he was taking his best friend with him. It felt like some sort of survival trip to the other side of the room. He managed to reach her though, miracle by miracle. 'Marlee, let's go. Together. I want to sleep together, I miss you.' Okay, he was drunk, he would never had said that to her sober. It was okay though, they were friends, they could say that kind of stuff to each other. 'It's walking distance to my place.' He took her hand, and pulled her against him. 'Anyway, I'm too drunk to get home by myself, so you have to bring me you know.' 

@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



It took only a few shots and they were both drunk. They kind off lost each other in the moment, too. While Marlee was talking to Isa and two other guys she haven’t met before, she saw Josh from across the room already flirting with some other pretty girl. He was handsome though, no wonder all the pretty girls liked him. So much for the old times, this wasn’t new for her either. From one moment on to the other, Isa kind off hit on one of the guys and they disappeared in the room without letting each other guy. The other guy, a tall lightly tinted dude who introduced himself as Timo got closer to her as well. She pushed him softly away, she didn’t want his touch.  She decided to go for another drink instead, but looking over to Josh again was a bad idea. The girl was kissing him, but Josh didn’t seem to give it much attention. In fact, their eyes linked for a moment. It didn’t take long before he stood up and walked over to her. There were so many things she thought of to say to him in response, but she wasn’t even able to. She was too drunk herself to reject his weird offer and let her body pull closer to his. She couldn’t even think of what he meant exactly when he said ‘sleep together’ but she didn’t even care. From the moment she had looked into his eyes tonight she had wanted him to touch her. ‘Okay, okay. Let’s go then.’ She said and she grabbed his hand. She kind off wanted to say goodbye to Isa but she was most probably with the other guy right now. She didn’t want to disturb them, if she could even find them, and decided to just leave her a message she was heading home. Marlee pulled herself and her friend through the party people and when they finally were on the streets she sighted in relieve. Fresh air, finally. Her cheeks went red from the alcohol, she could feel her face glowing, she always hated that. Luckily it was dark outside and Josh probably wouldn’t even notice it. ‘Did you have fun tonight? I missed you, Josh,’ Marlee pulled herself closer to Josh, his body was warm and she put her hand on his back. She couldn’t wait to be in bed, not only because she was tired, but also because then the two of them would be together, and she could hold him all night and no one had to know. She wanted to be in his arms, she wanted to cuddle all night, and some part of her even desired more than that, but maybe that was just the alcohol kicking in. The thought almost made her walk faster.

@each 
Each
Internationale ster



Next thing he knew, they were walking to his home, he had her in his arms. 'I had fun, no idea what happened though. I missed you too. I'm sorry, this pretty girl came up to me and you know how fast I'm distracted.' He didn't know why he said that. Fortunately, they could tell each other everything. He looked at her and started laughing. She was way more out of it than he was. He was actually taking care of her, or they took care of each other. 'you're way more fucked than I am, Mar. We are so wasted.' he laughed, thankful for being at his apartment already. He opened the front door, and said a cheeky 'Ladies first.' While waiting for the elevator, he couldn't help but look at her. When he was drunk, he wanted to do other things with her. The attraction was there, different even, but he never did it. She probably didn't want him, and he didn't want to ruin the friendship. The elevator was there, and she leaned against the wall, next to the buttons. He leaned with his left arm over her, standing a few centimeters away, and with his right arm he pushed number 10. Josh lived on the highest floor, off course, with an amazing over London. He came out of a rich family, and his father bought the apartment for him. It was the best thing his father did in his whole life, and Josh didn't know if that was a good thing or not. 'Almost there.' he said, and he leand in to whisper in her ear 'I'll always be there for you, Marlee.' His lips touched her ears, and for a split second, his tongue slid down her ear lap. Fuck. He was saved by the bell though, the elevator was on his floor. He could just pretend it was by accident. 

@mysteryland
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



Marlee giggled. ‘You don’t have to explain yourself, though. We are friends,’ she answered him when he talked about the other girl, but now she already regretted that she said that. It made her look like she wasn’t interested in him, she didn’t want him to think that. Was she, though? When he started laughing, she started laughing too. ‘Me? No, I am not, totally managing myself!’ Se said, although she knew denying it would made her seem even more wasted. She didn’t care, though. She smiled as she passed by and walked towards the elevator. She loved to be here. Not only because it was Josh his apartment, but also because he had the most amazing living situation ever. His apartment was spacious, modern, and had the best view over the city. How fortunate he came from a rich family.Stepping into the elevator she allowed herself to lean against the wall while Josh leaned over to push one of the buttons. Why did he smell so nice? Her knees almost turned weak when he came closer to whisper in her ear. It made her feel all those crazy things inside. Her heart almost stopped when she felt his lips on her hear, and started beating twice that fast when she felt his tongue on her skin, yet it was so fast she wasn’t even sure it truly happened. Was he teasing her? Was the alcohol testing her limits? She could feel her skin glowing under his touch. She didn’t want him to step away, but the elevator reached their floor and she knew he had to. Somehow she was glad he finally did though, when she noticed she had been holding her breath. She grabbed his hand before they stepped out and gave him a silly smile. ‘You’re crazy, Josh, you make me crazy..’ she said softly. She stood closer to him, so close she could feel his breath in her face. Her lips were almost on his, but the doors of the elevator opened and she let go of the moment to step outside of the lift. Shit, why did she need to do that? She didn’t want to risk their friendship, just because her stupid drunk ass wanted to kiss him, just because he made her feel special with his sweet words and gentle touches. Josh was always touchy when he was drunk, Marlee not that much. She didn’t want to give herself away while she knew he only did it for the sex. Which he would do with almost every girl at drunk moments. No, she didn’t want that, and the thought scared her. She pulled her hand away and bit her lip, regretting what she had almost done.

@each 
Each
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Wow. He didn't expect that at all. They almost kissed, and he let her take the first step. She pulled away, and he couldn't help but feel disappointed. 'I make you crazy? Well, what a good thing to know. Now, I will hold that against you for whole your life.' he was teasing her, secretly testing her. Why did he kiss with that girl earlier this evening? He loved being with Marlee... It was just, being single was so much easier. 'Hey, you won't get rid of me that soon.' and he grabbed her hand again. He took her to his bedroom, not like that, just to cuddle. He had respect for her, and he wanted to show her that. In his bedroom, the tension was high, and he just stared into her eyes briefly. 'I'll grab you a shirt, here.' He took the first T-shirt he saw in his closet, and walked towards Marlee. He didn't gave her the shirt though, as he would've done normally. He undressed her, not totally, but he pulled her shirt off. Smoothly, he managed to get the shirt on her body. 'You have to do the rest by yourself.' he grinsed and started undressing himself. He always just slept in his boxer, she saw his body multiple times, so it wasn't a big deal really. He came closer to her again, and leaned over to whisper in her ear again. 'You're so beautiful, Marlee.' This time, he went for it. With one hand in her neck, and the other on her waist, his tongue went down from her ear to her neck. He kissed her neck and while wanting to kiss her, he pulled back. 'Fuck, I'm so sorry. This shouldn't happen, we're best friends.' He grabbed her hand and took her with him, in bed. 'I respect you too much, Marlee.' He pulled the blankets over them and pushed his body against hers. His hands were all over her, soft and cuddly, appropriate still. He didn't want to be appropriate at all. 

@Mysteryland
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



She didn’t want Josh to get a hold of her, but although she took her hand back only a few seconds ago he managed to take her hand yet again and pulled her towards his bedroom. It wasn’t like she had not been here before. They had slept in the same bed multiple times, but this evening was different. The tension was there, Marlee could sense it, and she knew he felt it, too. She didn’t want to give herself away so easily, but she couldn’t help herself, she turned weak under his touch, and without struggle he let her undress her. Way too soon he stepped away to let her do the rest herself, as he started undressing himself. She didn’t want him to step away, not for a second. In the meantime she managed to get rid of the rest of her clothes so she only wore her underwear and Josh his loosy shirt over her naked body. She felt his body coming closer again and her heart started to beat faster. She had never felt this way before with him, this went way to far already, but she wanted it. Her hand was on his chest and she smiled weak under his words. Why was he teasing her like that? She almost pulled herself closer when she felt his lips in her neck, she wanted more, but Josh pulled away again. They were both on the edge, now. Although she was disappointed he pulled away, she let herself step into bed with him and came as close to him as he could be. She felt her body warm up already, and his hands were all over her skin. She wanted more. Only a few minuted ago she was sure this wasn’t right to do, they both knew that. Yet her heart ignored what was best and she let herself touch him, too. Her hands moved over his skin, on his chest and his shouders, on his strong arms. She was sure this was the savest place she could possibly be. ‘I know this is wrong Josh..’ she said softly. She looked into his eyes and came even closer. ‘But I don’t care.’ she whispered almost so softly, as if she almost didn’t want him to hear it. She did though, and she moved her lips to his neck, and started kissing him softly. She left a trail of kisses all to his lips and stopped right there to look into his eyes. ‘I want you’ she said, and there was no limit now. Her body was on fire, and he was her gasoline. She kissed him fiercy, and moved her body even closer to his, she wanted to feel his hands everywhere now.

@each 
Each
Internationale ster



It happened just like that. He moaned when she kissed his neck, his weak spot. Before he knew it, they were making out. Josh wanted this for ages. His hand went down, and slipped into her underwear. This was really happening; second base already, and fuck she did things to him he didn't even knew were possible. The feeling was so intense that he probably couldn't even handle it. He was used to girls who he didn't have feelings for, they slept together and if it was good, they probably saw each other for like a month or so, while still hooking up with others. There were no strings attached and he could only really hurt someone accidentally. He stopped. It was too difficult, he liked her too much. 'Sorry, I really can't do this.' he said, and he gave her a gentle kiss on her mouth. They were too drunk as well. Okay, one little kiss. He wanted to continue, but he was trying his best to hold back. She would definitely feel his thing against her body, she knew he wanted more, right? 'You know we're such good friends, I don't want to hurt you.' Wow, 10 points for him. 'You want meeeee.' he said laughing, teasing her again. Maybe through banter, they would get their normal selves again. He wanted her as well. He would say that tomorrow though, when they were sobered up. He bit his underlip, while looking at hers, and let his hand go down again, like he couldn't control them. His mind was saying not to, but it just happened. She was extremely wet, and he was close to going down. 'Should we continue this sober? When we're sure?' he asked.

@mysteryland 
Mysteryland
YouTube-ster



Some disappointment filled her heart when Josh suddenly stopped and told her he couldn't really do this. Why? Why now? He should think of those things before he starting teasing her. She turned down and catched her breath, the whole moment was intense. When he kissed her softly she smiled a bit, but that smile disappeared soon enough. 'Why tease me like that if you can't do this?' She said, sounding more disappointed than she had meant. He looked at her biting his underlip, why was he so sexy? Why didn't they do this sooner? She felt his hand going down her underwear again, and pushed her hips towards it. Why say one thing, and do the other? Josh was still testing her. It turned her on. 'But okay, your call..' she said, her voice was husky. She turned around with a smirk on her face, and pressed her body against his. She had definitely felt that thing between his legs, maybe this was even harder for him than for her. She closed her eyes for a second, and thought this was probably the most happy and safe she could feel, here in his bed in his arms. She already knew she probably wanted to stay here all night and all day, but when she opened her eyes reality hit her again. She stared at his watch, a golden Armani, and she thought of everything that had happened the last few days. Immediately she felt bad, for even thinking about this, but she couldn't let this thought go. Could that watch even be half as much as the amount she owed Ash? Would Josh even notice if it disappeared, would he ever find out if she even did it? The thought scared her, and she already didn't have her emotions under control. Softly she started crying, but she was sure Josh would notice that. 'I am sorry, Josh...' Stealing from her best friend already made her feel so guilty, but she couldn't tell him the truth either, which made her even more sad.

@each 
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